Thankful thoughts

November is a busy month for all of us, but especially at our house.   We have four birthdays in addition to a big family Thanksgiving, which amounts to a food orgy for anywhere from twenty to twenty five people.  

Six years ago all those things had to be put on hold because my father was dying.  His last thirteen months of life had been played out in a nursing home, and now there were no more rabbits to pull out of the hat.

I know everyone thinks being in a nursing home is sad, and in a lot of ways it is, but Pop had a good quality of life those last months.  He had the wife he adored there every day, friends from church and some he had worked with visited.  I'm an only child, so my husband and three kids were Pop's family and support group, and we were in and out of there every day as well.

Sunday was a day he looked forward to, because I would stop and get the News Journal and a fresh bunch of flowers and head in to the nursing home almost every Sunday morning.   Pop would sit in his wheelchair, the paper spread out on his bed, and direct me as I arranged the fresh flowers in a vase.  Then every attendant who came in he'd say, "See what my daughter brought me?   She's really my doctor you know.....she takes good care of me."   We had a lot of good, quality time together those last months.  I spent more time and talked more with Dad than I had in my entire adult life. 

My father fought in WW 2....he was wounded eight times, lost in the jungle, and they sent him back home to Kentucky to die at the age of 21.  He fooled them all and lived a long life, but it was a life that was haunted by experiences he never talked about.  In the nursing home he told me about some of those things for the first time, and I felt I came to understand him just a little better.  He had served his country well, but he had gone through hell.  Being the strong man he was he knew if you were marching through hell to keep marching....and he did.

Our family gathered in Dad's private room for Thanksgiving that year.  We brought food and we clung together for support and we waited.....it was all there was to do.   Occasionally he would rally, moments that were precious and over too soon.  I think I will always remember that Thanksgiving as the most important one of my life because it was a family pulling together, supporting one another.   In spite of where we were and what was happening we had a great deal to be thankful for.

Another November has rolled around, and the speed with which the months go by now seems to be in fast forward.  We will be preparing for kids and grandkids and friends to come for the day, cooking enough food to feed a small country and soon kicking a path through shoes left around the family room door. 

I am thankful for my wonderful family, I am thankful for my friends, and I am thankful for memories that make me cry......