The alarm on my iPad went off at six a.m. sharp, just as
Siri had promised. Before I rolled out
of bed she informed me I could expect a sunny, 70 degree fall day. I love it when she has good news for me.
Driving into work I was entranced by the changing colors of
the leaves until my car chimed to get my attention. It nicely pointed out that my trunk was open,
a fact underscored every time I hit a bump by the gentle bobbing of the trunk
lid in my rearview mirror. Last week the
car informed me I had a tire with low air pressure, something I never would have
noticed until I needed road-side service.
My devoted Chevrolet always nags me till I fasten my seat belt and warns
me that I’m low on fuel with a ‘get gas dummy’ light. I know I take it for granted, but this car is
so thoughtful in so many ways. My
husband’s van is even more sophisticated, with a hands-free, voice recognition
phone system, satellite radio, CD/DVD players and sliding doors that open and close
with the touch of a key fob button. Get
carried away with the remote and the automatic doors and tailgate give it the
appearance of one of the shape-changing Transformers.
Settling in at my desk I check my iPhone and discover two
voicemails. As I touch the screen the
phone effortlessly redials the callers. Next, as I return emails and prepare for a
morning meeting, my printer warns that I will soon be out of ink. Oh, bother. The ‘15 minutes till the meeting starts’
reminder on my computer screen makes me realize I have just enough time left to
check the tracking report for a package I’m expecting to arrive at my home
later today; the workday is officially underway.
I recently spent the evening with two of my (seven)
wonderful grandchildren. I scooped up
the girls from two separate locations; we had dinner, and then headed back to
their house for the evening. When an
impromptu concert broke out I snapped photos of the viola playing duo with my
iPad. A bit later we downloaded an app
to learn French and spent the rest of the time laughing as we learned new
words. Thirteen year old Sam served as
instructor, nine year old Meg and I were the struggling students. Siri (the voice of iPad) must have had a good
time as well because when Meg prompted her, she told us a joke! Out of town on a business trip, their Dad
kept texted me on his progress as he headed home along the route that On Star
had downloaded to his car.
When I call my bank, my doctor, my pharmacy, the chamber of
commerce or any other number of places I get a recorded voice with instructions
on how best to work my way through their automated maze. I come in contact with a real person only as
a last resort; that doesn’t happen if I do what the electronic voices tell me
to do.
Automated systems give and take my money; I’m almost on a
first name basis with my ATM. My favorite grocery offers me a self-scan option
that I use frequently, and I religiously take my symptoms to the internet
before I take them to my doctor. At
some point I bet that grocery store scanner technology will evolve and make my
doctor obsolete, too. No appointment
necessary, just point the scanner gun at your aching knee and the problem and
solution will pop up on the screen!
We seem to be on the road to making people obsolete… I
actually think we’ve already blazed the trail and we’re just waiting for the
paving to be completed! Don’t get me wrong…..these technological perks
are often great stuff. Some of them save
time, some seem to actually take more time, and some have just been created to
waste my time. It’s the ones that keep
my learning curve straight up that sometimes just drive me nuts.
My prediction is that humans will continue to communicate less
and less. I can see the enthusiasm for
talking to one another falling to the level of the appreciation a wife
experiences when trying to talk to her husband during an OSU bowl game. I’m not saying it’s a good thing, and I’m not
prepared to say it’s a bad thing. Speaking
as a soon-to-be-completely-unnecessary human being….It is what it is.
I don’t know how long it will be before the machines
completely take over the world, but I will have made my point when Siri calls
my Garmin to direct me the restaurant where an anniversary party has been
planned for my burglar alarm and his main squeeze, our answering machine.
Life is Good
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