It's getting ugly out there....

Not long ago I was thrust into the role of ‘people watcher’ while waiting for a friend.   During that half hour I arrived at some very definite fashion ideas I would like to share with you.  I'm not being judgemental...I'm just sayin' :

I am in favor of women of all ages dressing fashionably, and I don’t think you’re ever ‘too old’ for a pair of comfortable jeans.  Having said that, perhaps women should re-think the “I just fell off the back of a motorcycle” look after the age of 25.   If you are 65 and postponing your clothes shopping for the week you will be in Sturgis….well, you get my drift.

I think manufacturers should consider putting age tags in grownup clothes the same as they do for infants and toddlers.  Instead of 0 to 12 months a tag might say 20-Y to 34 years.   If you see 2T inside the collar of a shirt you have a good idea if this is the right size for your grandson.  By the same token, a tag that says 18-Y to 24-Y inside a bikini might lead you to the understanding that a bright pink bikini might not be the right choice for your 56 year old keester.  Some women need that kind of help, and I saw a lot of them.  A good alternative might be to require a prescription to purchase a leather halter top.

Makeup is another thing that caught my eye as I sat watching people parade past.  In my (never to be) humble opinion make up is a good idea IF you know how to use it.  It’s all about enhancing or disguising.  Some women fall for what I call the “Vogue effect”.  We’ve all seen the pictures in Vogue magazine with models sporting glitter covered eyelashes, pink eyelids and lips that look like bathroom plungers.  That is for effect…not a guide for what to wear at the grocery.  If you’ve started to look like Tammy Faye Baker (rest her soul) or if you are applying your make up with a spatula, you might want to get the opinion of a trusted friend on toning down your look.

I did not see one hair style that made me change my long standing opinion that hair color should be confined to colors found in nature.  Personally I don’t like purple hair, green or blue stripes, or cotton candy pink.   I’m not at all creative when it comes to hair…mine or anyone else’s.  I think clean and combed is enough to satisfy my hair requirements, so it’s probably a good thing I’m not in charge.

Bling.  What is this preoccupation with anything that is shiny?  Rows and rows of golden chains, earrings with diamonds that would choke a Chihuahua, and clanking bangles that announce the arrival of a woman with earrings that could have been wind chimes.  Tacky, tinkly, sparkly … gold lame patches on sweatshirts and animal print, diamond studded shoes…oh, my!! 

Finally I am left with this last question.  Why would anyone wear clothes that do not fit them comfortably?  My bet is that most of the folks that walked past me were in search of another pair of slacks/jeans in the same ill-fitting size they had on.   Muffin tops and tortured seams were the order of the day….but why?  Just because you can stuff your frame into a ten doesn’t mean you should….and it sure doesn’t mean you’re a ten!!  

Clothing that fits properly is much more attractive on everyone, and I’m not just nagging the women. Too many men wear jeans that fit under an expanding belly.  The result is back pockets that rest just above the red stripe on the dudes white tube socks.  Not an exciting look.

There must be some middle ground between wearing a tuxedo and going out of the house looking like the cast of Duck Dynasty.  Let’s look for it before it’s too late, America.  It’s getting ugly out there!!

 

                                                          Life is Good